Saturday, July 25, 2009

What's next?

If you've followed the blog, you've seen him,
Mannekin Pis.

We didn't know it, but we have a Mannekin Pis of our own.

We were packing the car from a hotel stay in Germany.
I had the kids at the Continental breakfast.
Matt was loading the car with luggage.
While I was cleaning up Arleigh's highchair, and the floor, and his arms,
and his face, and the seats, ...I realized Stella and Emory had vanished.
But only for a minute.

I couldn't have seen it coming.
Stella came screaming though the hotel lobby.
"Mooooom! Mom! EMORY JUST POOP-EED!"
Five seconds behind her, Emory came waddling into the lobby
right in front of the Army base reception desk.
I was stunned, (but not completely), simultaneously praying
that turds weren't going to fall out of his pants and onto the hotel lobby floor.

I hastily finished the breakfast clean up, letting the tabletop crumbs go.
"What Emory? You did what? Where's your father?"
(I know where father is, he's packing up .
I'm just want him to magically appear out of nowhere. NOW!)

I managed to get everyone outside and regroup.
And in a downward spiral, it all seemed to get worse.
"Now what Emory? Are your pants messed up?
Why didn't you tell me you had to go?"

Stella shouted to me, wandering across the hotel landscape outside,
"Do you wanna see it? He POOPED RIGHT OVER HERE!"
"Emory, what? You pooped in the bushes?"

I looked down at him.
He was holding his shorts at the waist band.
"Yeah, I poop-eed over dare.
I was Manneken Pis, only it came from back here."
He grinned, pointing to his rear end.

I shut my eyes and took a moment.
"Please God, just let me disappear now."
I had to glance up to see if anyone was
witnessing my moment of motherhood and insanity
all converging into one big, nasty nightmare.

Stella shouted, even louder this time... "IT LOOKS LIKE A DRUMSTICK!"

"What next? Really? Bring it on."







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